I think it’s about time that someone somewhere spoke up about us. The shy folk, the readers, the thoughtful. I can’t tell you how many times I have been mistaken for someone other than who I am, someone other than the person that I see myself as because I am introverted. That’s right, I said it. I’m an introvert. And I have a good feeling most of you are, too.

Often times introverts are wrongly labeled by extroverts. You know the ones: outgoing, the go-getters, the people who do most of the talking and are quick to jump in right away with their thoughts, and more often enough in my experience, with their opinion of your label as a person. I know a few extroverts who are beautiful and wonderful people, enriching my life in ways that I ordinarily could not. And I also know a few extroverts who have treated me awfully solely on their uneducated belief that there was something wrong with me, something wrong with all of my friends, and nearly one third to a half of all Americans.

We’re taught from an early age that everyone is different, from our size, to our color, to the way we speak. Why, then, are we not taught the difference between extroverts and introverts at this age, too? It wasn't until I was singled out as being rude, quiet, and boring that I realized something is very wrong in the way that some people were taught to understand others.

There is a great difference, to those who take the time to understand their partners and friends, between being shy and being an introvert. A person once told me that a new girl working in his lab was boring. She didn't strike up conversation, and didn't actively engage with him without being prompted to do so. Boring. The first thing that popped into my head was that perhaps she didn't like the shitty music he played out loud, inconsiderate that not everyone in the room liked the same alternative electric rock that he did. Or perhaps it was because as an undergrad she was a little intimidated by his age, although at 24 he was still doing the same undergraduate work he had been since his super-senior year of college. Or, she may have been content thinking to herself, tucked away in her own thoughts and wasn't interested in small talk to just hear her voice, though nothing of substance was being said in the first place.

I wish I had been there for this girl to assure her that there was nothing wrong with her silence, that the boy would never understand the type of person she was, for he was never taught to appreciate people for their thoughts; he was never taught to listen.

Introverts bring some of the best ideas to the table, but are often beat to the punch by the pushy extroverts who get there faster. I love introverts because a common quality among us is our ability to listen, internalize, and present ideas that have had time to stew and get richer. Our actions are often not hasty, and when others mistake our quietness with rudeness they often cannot remember the details of the conversation in the ways that introverts do. It has taken me a while to become comfortable with the woman I have become. While I enjoy going to a noisy bar every now and again, my domain is a comfortable and quiet atmosphere where I can reap the most from intimate conversations and relationships. Where I can serve wine to a close group of people who stimulate my brain, my heart. These are the people that understand if I am not filling the void with lofty conversation, I am thinking. I am listening. I am not awkward, and certainly not rude.

My sister Molly shared a Ted Talk with me a little over a year ago about the power of introversion, that after watching made me smile with a feeling of unabashed acceptance. Please take the time, or find a time when you can really watch from start to finish. It’s a powerful talk that explains in 20 minutes what took me twenty years to learn to appreciate.